蚕听I鈥檓 happily married to a man I adore. He鈥檚 a lovely person and a wonderful husband. He鈥檚 also incredibly handsome. One of his good friends is also married and we couples hang out often together. His wife and I have become very close friends.
Neither of them is particularly good looking, but they are lovely people, and we don鈥檛 care. I only mention it because they are always commenting on how good looking we both are, but especially my husband.
Recently, I was away on a business trip and my husband told me they had invited him over for dinner. I was happy for him that he had something to do while I was out of town. He called me several hours later and told me the dinner was absurd and now he doesn鈥檛 know what to do.
Apparently, they had served all foods considered aphrodisiacs: the meal started off with wine and oysters, there was an avocado salad, asparagus and dessert consisted of a chocolate almond cake and coffee. My husband only found out about the background to the foods while they were being served because the other couple told him. They then started fooling around in front of him and tried to get him to join in.
In other words, they were hoping to engage my husband in a threesome. He managed to escape unscathed, but he鈥檚 completely shaken up by the whole event. I returned home the next day and found him in shock. He can鈥檛 understand why his friend would do that to him. He鈥檚 not even flattered by it because he says it was quite aggressive and, to him, out of nowhere.
Now we don鈥檛 know what to say or how to act with this couple.
Threes aren鈥檛 for everyone
础听The two of you need to sit down and discuss the situation calmly, now that some time has passed. First, are either of you at all interested in experimenting with this couple, as a couple, or just one of you and/or them? If so, this is a safe place to do so.
However, if neither of you are interested, which sounds like the case, then you need to discuss how to move forward in your relationship with them again, if the friendship is important to you. This episode may have pushed your husband to a point where he can鈥檛 look at them the same and isn鈥檛 interested in hanging out with them. He may feel unsafe in their presence, afraid that if left alone with one or both they鈥檒l come on to him again.
The quickest way to get to the bottom of this is to meet somewhere public, the four of you, and talk it out. You鈥檒l know from that one get-together how to move forward. Just ensure you and your husband are on the same page.
蚕听My wife just screamed at me in front of our guests that I鈥檓 lazy and stupid and I鈥檓 just lucky I鈥檓 good in bed or she鈥檇 kick me out. I couldn鈥檛 tell if she was kidding or not because she鈥檚 never told me I鈥檓 good in bed before.
We have sex frequently, but it鈥檚 nothing out of the ordinary.
And I鈥檓 not lazy or stupid, so what was she talking about?
Crazy Wife
础听I can鈥檛 tell if this whole question is a joke. But what bothers me is that she screamed at you in front of your guests. That鈥檚 not respectful or loving or kind. I think you two should discuss your boundaries, especially what is and isn鈥檛 appropriate in front of other people.
FEEDBACK Regarding the no gas zone (June 6):
Reader 1 鈥淚 have a similar problem due to IBS. There is an over-the-counter med called GAS-X. Can be used after meals or at bedtime up to three times per day. No side effects. It is miraculous. Worth a try.鈥
Reader 2 鈥淭he simple solution to the above-mentioned problem is: Taking a Probiotic tablet daily.鈥
Reader 3 鈥淚 hope No Gas Zone writes you back with the results of the conversation with her flatulent boyfriend. She might be surprised to learn that she farts too.鈥
FEEDBACK Regarding charity chaser (June 9):
Reader: 鈥淚 always politely say that I鈥檇 like to think about it and then ask for a pamphlet or contact information so I can follow up later with a possible donation. It鈥檚 interesting they rarely are able or willing to provide that to me.
鈥淭hanks for the interesting column.鈥
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