I鈥檓 a divorced mom of three teens. An educator and a working artist, I鈥檇 describe myself as intellectual, curious, enthusiastic, both silly and serious, but above all, caring and warm. I think I have a skeptical but sparkly brain and I鈥檓 genuinely interested in understanding people. I鈥檓 good at really seeing people, and when I鈥檓 in a relationship I think my partners appreciate that I鈥檒l always try to understand their perspective. When I was a teenager, I vowed to not have an 鈥渙rdinary鈥 life. I think I鈥檝e achieved that goal, just not in the ways I expected.
My family responsibilities take a lot of my time and attention, so if you鈥檙e looking for someone to be joined at the hip, that鈥檚 not going to be me. My politics lean left, so if you鈥檙e leaning any other direction, we will not share a world view. Also, I lead a fairly quiet life, so if you鈥檙e looking for a very extroverted person, you won鈥檛 find that in me.
I鈥檝e been divorced for almost a decade and I鈥檝e had a couple of long relationships. For the past year, I鈥檝e been single and not dating at all. I like the mental space of being single, and the time I鈥檝e had to focus on my own growth. I enjoy my own company, but sometimes it鈥檚 lonely. I miss having 鈥渕y person鈥 to spend time with, do new things with or just cosy up with. I love the early excitement of being in love, that 鈥渙n top of the world鈥 feeling. I particularly like the feeling of safety and connection that comes from being in a stable, mutually supportive partnership.
At the moment, my dream relationship would look fairly boring! I want someone to go for walks with, have coffee and read the paper in bed with, take some short getaways, but still both have our own time to attend to our responsibilities outside of the relationship. My partner and I would encourage each other towards growth with positive, open and clear communication. We would both be mature and ready to approach love and life without ego. Every relationship I鈥檝e had has been unique, so I鈥檓 open to being surprised about what my next relationship looks like; I don鈥檛 have a specific template for it.
Kindness, intelligence, curiosity, humour and a strong sense of self are some of the most attractive qualities for me. For me, empathy is the basis for all meaningful human connections, and it鈥檚 an especially important trait in a partner. I鈥檓 sometimes goofy and silly and would love someone who is able to find humour in the mundane and laugh at the ridiculousness of life. Finally, I think it鈥檚 important that both partners are self aware and confident in their worth so that they can approach the relationship without overactive egos.
I鈥檓 outdoorsy and enjoy walking and exploring. I鈥檇 love to date someone interested in doing some of the great long distance hikes of the world with me!
Trump supporters, anti-vaxxers, pro-lifers, transphobes, conspiracy theorists, racists or any flavours of those elements are 100 per cent hard no for me. As an agnostic, I feel like someone who is devoutly religious would not match well with me. Regular substance use or heavy alcohol consumption would be a deal-breaker for me. People who are arrogant or who talk without listening are not attractive to me.
Since I鈥檝e pretty much sworn off app-based dating, I appreciated this opportunity to just try something different. I guess the optimist in me thought 鈥渨hy not?鈥. As a 海角社区官网Star reader, I hoped that it would be more likely that another reader would be a better fit for me than a random suggestion generated by an app. I hoped that perhaps someone who would take the time to read and write a response based on a series like this might be more reliable than an app swipe.
I鈥檇 also like to temper my compulsive news-reading with a more optimistic reason to check the paper. In these turbulent times, I鈥檇 love to find a partner to cultivate a bit of peace and comfort and hope for the world.
- Sarah Laing
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