Last week, I wrote on Facebook, 鈥淲ho else is tired?鈥
Friends clamoured to share their stories of exhaustion only five months into the year.
In my family, we made a conscious effort not to overschedule the kids, but between extracurriculars, playdates, sports tournaments, school plays, field trips, it is still a lot. I鈥檝e become the child Uber, shuttling small people who cannot drive to various events. When I pictured having children, I didn鈥檛 imagine myself trying to answer emails between rugby practice and dance jamborees.
Then there are also family and friend commitments 鈥 celebrating a birthday with dinner downtown, helping unpack after a move, or attending a funeral to say goodbye to someone who was like family.
On top of all of that, I鈥檓 a responsible, working adult with deadlines, meetings and endless emails.
We鈥檙e not just tired because we鈥檙e not sleeping enough. We鈥檙e tired because we鈥檙e carrying so much. Burnout feels like it鈥檚 just around the corner for many of us.
defines burnout as 鈥渁 state of emotional, mental, and often physical exhaustion brought on by prolonged or repeated stress. Though it’s most often caused by problems at work, it can also appear in other areas of life, such as parenting, caretaking, or romantic relationships.鈥
There is just so much happening in life and in the world balancing it all is difficult. Parenting, family, relationships, and work 鈥 and trying to do it all well 鈥 is a full-time job. A study from found that working parents (51 per cent) and millennial professionals (50 per cent) report high levels of burnout.
Ask anyone how they are, and you鈥檒l hear 鈥淚鈥檓 so busy!鈥濃 parents with kids, singles with busy social lives, people with aging parents, pet parents. Last week, my family and I attended my youngest child鈥檚 dance jamboree. As we settled into our seats, among hundreds of other parents and friends, my mom said, 鈥淚 don鈥檛 think there was anything like this when you were a child.鈥
She鈥檚 right. We kids were pretty much feral back in the early and mid-1980s. There were fewer events planned for me, aside from weekly piano lessons and youth group at church, not much was scheduled for us.
Now, between catching up on messages, chauffeuring children to and fro, being an understanding and patient parent, connecting with friends and family, staying in shape, cooking healthy meals, spending time with your pet, keeping your home somewhat tidy and staying on top of the news, it鈥檚 a lot.
And I鈥檓 feeling it.
While I鈥檓 grateful for all the people in my life and the activities that I鈥檓 invited to, but I don鈥檛 believe we鈥檙e supposed to feel this way 鈥 working for months to take a week鈥檚 vacation somewhere to come back home facing the same challenges to our time or staying up late to read or binge the latest season of “You” because that鈥檚 the only time we have to ourselves.
So, what can we do?
We can prioritize. Say no sometimes. Let some things slide.
For example: 鈥淵es, the laundry is piling up 鈥 but spending time with family came first. Besides, we have more than enough clothes.鈥
I鈥檒l prioritize my children. I went to the dance jamboree and I鈥檒l be front and centre for both the opening and closing nights of my daughter鈥檚 school play 鈥 she鈥檚 The Mad Hatter in “Alice in Wonderland.”
This past Monday night, after a packed Mother鈥檚 Day weekend, a funeral that morning, rugby game that afternoon and swimming lessons later that evening, I ordered a pizza for dinner. And refused to feel guilty about it.
The home-cooked meal with all the healthy fixings will just have to wait for another day.
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