蚕听I had a medical issue and visited my doctor. She sent a referral to a dermatologist, which took several months. That doctor told me my issue was purely cosmetic and required surgery to remove, for a hefty sum of money.
I鈥檓 not that bothered. I was more worried it was something problematic. Once I knew it wasn鈥檛, I opted to live with it.
This was a few months ago. Recently, I noticed my issue was clearing up. I watched for a week, doing nothing differently than I鈥檇 been doing for years, and after a week, it was completely gone.
How can a doctor tell me the only way to get rid of something is through voluntary and expensive surgery? When in fact, time would heal itself.
Non-believer
础听That鈥檚 frustrating, for sure. They are professional doctors who have spent years learning and training. But they鈥檙e not perfect. No one is.
You could go back to your derm and show him how the issue has cleared up. Then ask if his diagnosis has changed since it healed on its own. Don鈥檛 be angry; just be grateful you didn鈥檛 spend the money on the unnecessary surgery.
蚕听True story: my brother started dating a woman several months ago. He told me about her because he really liked her. He hasn鈥檛 had great luck with women and felt strongly about this one quickly. I hadn鈥檛 met her or even saw a photo.
About a month after they met, I was out with friends and started clicking with a woman. We chatted all night, danced and ended the night with a kiss. We started messaging, met up a few times and I was really getting into her. Meanwhile, my brother was falling deeper in love with the woman he was dating.
Maybe two months later, I was out partying with friends and this girl and my brother walked into the club. He saw me kissing my girl, walked straight up to me and punched me. My girl screamed, not knowing he was my brother, and the bouncers came and ejected him from the club. I went outside to see what his problem was but he was gone. I called, texted, messaged, but he didn鈥檛 respond.
The next day, I found him at home, and he was hysterical. Said I was the worst brother ever, that he鈥檇 broken up with his lying, cheating girlfriend and he hated both of us. I didn鈥檛 understand at all what he was talking about, and he came at me again. I left. Later that night, my girlfriend started telling me how her sister just got dumped by this guy who she was really into, and how she has no idea what happened, etc. I told her what happened with my brother and then the two of us looked at each other.
I said, 鈥淲hat鈥檚 your sister鈥檚 name and what鈥檚 her boyfriend鈥檚 name?鈥 Yup, you guessed it. Her sister and my brother are together. And the sisters look so much alike, in every way, though they鈥檙e not twins, that in a dark club it鈥檚 not surprising my brother thought I was with his girlfriend.
We got together with her, my girlfriend鈥檚 sister, and explained everything. We see the humour, but my brother won鈥檛 speak to any of us to hear the truth. What do we do?
Twins Not Twins
础听That is a crazy story. Since your brother isn鈥檛 willing to speak with you or his girlfriend, the two of you are just going to have to ambush him. I mean that gently. You know his schedule. Find him at a time and place where he can鈥檛 run. Start by apologizing for any misinterpretation. Have his girlfriend with you, so she can do the same. Then introduce him to her sister, a.k.a. your girlfriend.
He needs to see it to believe it. I鈥檓 sure he鈥檒l be shocked, but he should get over it.
FEEDBACK Regarding the confused mom (Feb. 10):
Reader: 鈥淏y her own admission she has asked her unmarried daughter 鈥榗ountless鈥 times whether she鈥檚 gay or non-binary. That doesn鈥檛 make her wonderful 鈥 just annoying. It is ridiculous to assume unattached people must be something other than straight. And to harp on it is rude and insensitive. Every time she inquires about her daughter鈥檚 sexuality she is asking, in effect, 鈥榃hat鈥檚 wrong with you? Why aren鈥檛 you normal?鈥
鈥淭hat she鈥檚 willing to accept other sexual orientations is probably a significant step forward for her, but she also needs to accept the fact that not everyone needs or wants to be in a sexual relationship and that it鈥檚 probably time for her to quit her intrusive nagging.鈥
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