TOKYO (AP) 鈥 For stretches of her four long years in running purgatory, the poster child for a drug-fighting system in sports that nobody truly understands was as likely to be seen driving her 鈥71 VW minibus across the country as working out on the track.
America鈥檚 reigning 5,000-meter champion, Shelby Houlihan, used what is now known, infamously, to scratch some things off her bucket list. She bought the burgundy bus — sight unseen — and logged an estimated 6,000 miles on a tour of America that wasn鈥檛 possible when she was training.
鈥淚 thought, I didn鈥檛 have running to hold me back,鈥 Houlihan said. 鈥淚鈥檝e got to go do some fun things.鈥
Now that her ban is expired, 鈥渇un鈥 means rediscovering the purpose for all those miles she鈥檚 piled up 鈥 not in the minibus, but over four years of running just to run.
Houlihan was entered in the 5,000 meters at world championships in Japan鈥檚 National Stadium, the place she was denied a chance to compete four years ago in the wake of a polarizing doping ban that took away not one, but two Olympics.
This will be her first major outdoor track meet since she finished fourth in the 1,500 in Doha at the 2019 worlds.
鈥淢ost people believe your prime is like 27 to 30 or 31, and those are the years that I missed,鈥 said the 32-year-old Iowa native who lives out of a camper with her boyfriend, two dogs and a cat in Flagstaff, Arizona.
鈥淚 can鈥檛 do anything to get those back,鈥 she said. 鈥淧art of me wonders what I could鈥檝e done. But that鈥檚 a rabbit hole I don鈥檛 need to go down.鈥
鈥淚 knew I didn’t cheat鈥
Houlihan says she shifts between trying to shine a light on a system she says ultimately betrayed her and going about the business of making up for lost time.
She said she 鈥渂lindly believed鈥 in the global anti-doping system because, as she put it, 鈥淚 knew I didn鈥檛 cheat.鈥 Then, it turned drastically and dramatically against her.
Four years after she made news of the ban public on the eve of the 2021 Olympic trials, there remain some who saw Houlihan improve drastically in the late 2010s and never believed her alibi for testing positive for a performance enhancer: that she ingested it by eating a drug-tainted pork burrito bought from a food truck.
Among those who did, however, were the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency, which tested her 53 times between 2017 and 2021 without turning up a positive.
USADA has passed on a number of similar contamination cases over the years, and the subject has become even more fraught in the years since Houlihan鈥檚 case erupted.
The World Anti-Doping Agency鈥檚 handling of a in the leadup to the Paris Olympics brought recriminations about the differing ways drug-fighting agencies choose to handle cases steeped in the complex science of contamination.
Houlihan鈥檚 case was taken up not by USADA but by the Athletics Integrity Unit 鈥 the agency formed to help World Athletics police doping 鈥 and it offered her no bailout. It also offered her no consideration for the fact that rules concerning contamination had been relaxed to account for recent improvements of lab equipment to detect the most scant traces of banned substances.
Houlihan’s return to the big-time comes less than a week after the Court of Arbitration for Sport upheld a contamination ban 鈥 a case in which USADA believed Knighton’s excuse, but the AIU appealed.
鈥淚f they follow up on something, there’s probably a really good reason why they’re doing it,鈥 World Athletics President Seb Coe said when asked about how different agencies handle contamination cases differently. 鈥淭hey don’t leave a lot to chance.鈥
Houlihan said it didn’t take long to recognize the losing battle she was up against, even if she wasn’t ready to accept it.
鈥淲hen the ban first happened, there was this fire and stubbornness and a 鈥楽crew them, I鈥檓 going to break records anyway, I don鈥檛 care if they count,鈥欌 Houlihan said. 鈥淭hat ended up being so much harder than I anticipated. I鈥檓 not really fueled well by anger.鈥
Running just to run
Even so, Houlihan kept running, even when she wasn鈥檛 sure why.
Her training alongside her peers on the circuit was all but shut off because of the ban. So, Houlihan went to local running clubs, met new people, tried to make connections that had once been there because of her day job but had since vanished.
Her contract with Nike vanished — 鈥淭here wasn鈥檛 any actual phone call. I just sort of stopped getting paid,鈥 she said 鈥 and so, to make ends meet, Houlihan slept on couches, did some house-sitting and took care of cats.
Now that she鈥檚 back in the game, she finds herself thinking about performance enhancers in ways that hadn鈥檛 occurred to her before.
鈥淚 don鈥檛 take supplements anymore. I drink Pedialyte and that鈥檚 about it,鈥 she said. 鈥淭he meat I eat, I freeze it just in case I get tested. And if I do get tested, that meat will sit in the freezer until I hear it鈥檚 a clean test. It鈥檚 not the way I like to live, but it鈥檚 the way I have to at this point.鈥
It鈥檚 the price to pay to bring her race back onto tracks where the times really count and there are medals on the line. She at indoor worlds last March 鈥 a sign that the four years scratching items off her bucket list hadn鈥檛 robbed her of everything.
鈥淚 knew I didn鈥檛 want to walk away from this sport,鈥 she said. 鈥淚 contemplated it. But if I walked away, I was always going to wonder what I could鈥檝e done if I鈥檇 stuck to it.鈥
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