海角社区官网

鈥淚t鈥檚 a paradox of choice聽鈥斅爕ou have so many people in Toronto, but it鈥檚 hard to establish connections,鈥� said Huynh. 鈥淚t was lonely.鈥�

Huynh, who moved to Calgary in September, may have been lonely in Toronto, but his experience was far from unique. According to research, 海角社区官网is Canada鈥檚 most populous and loneliest city, a problem that affects residents of all ages, from university graduates launching their careers to grandmothers coping with the solitude that often accompanies aging.聽

Young people who grew up watching “Friends” or “How I Met Your Mother” flock here to study or turbocharge their careers and expect to establish their own wry, funny crew聽鈥� people they can call on to catch a movie, grab a drink or attend a festival.聽

Instead, they end up in condos with views of a sparkling city that feels oddly remote, where they shuttle between work, the gym and the nearest food court, eat alone and finesse the side hustles that help them make rent. They think everyone else鈥檚 social life is better than theirs.

鈥淲hen you鈥檙e in that lonely state, you don鈥檛 see that other people are lonely, too,鈥� says Huynh.

Disillusionment with 海角社区官网is showing up in measurable ways聽鈥斅燬tatsCan says Toronto鈥檚 longstanding gravitational pull, exerted by its education institutions, professional opportunities and big-city attractions, is no longer enough to keep people moored here.聽

With the uptake of remote work during the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020, 海角社区官网began experiencing a net loss of 10,000 residents a year to other provinces. In 2022-2023, the net loss hit 16,000. Alberta and the Atlantic provinces have been the biggest beneficiaries of this trend.

Huynh ultimately decided to leave 海角社区官网to escape the grind, establish a better work-life balance and hopefully, a better, more connected social life.聽

Efforts are underway to help residents of 海角社区官网鈥� deemed the loneliest in Canada in a 海角社区官网Foundation report in 2023 鈥� build more connections in order to improve their quality of life, but the reasons for loneliness are varied and complex.

In the wake of the 2023 loneliness report, Volunteer 海角社区官网gave out 35 micro-grants in 2024 鈥斅�$1,000 each聽鈥斅爁or projects as varied as a queer swim club, a walking group for Ghanaian seniors, and lessons on steel tongue drums,聽in an effort to rebuild social relationships that were lost or damaged by COVID restrictions.聽

鈥淧eople weren鈥檛 doing the things they did before and not doing them as frequently, or the people they knew in those groups or clubs or that constellation changed,” said Volunteer 海角社区官网executive director聽Joanne McKiernan.

Etobicoke grandmother Lydia Brown was grieving the death of a son during COVID when she decided to join a micro-funded group in Etobicoke, called Sistaz in Sound, which offered tutorials on steel drums, and other activities, including beading and crochet, to encourage people to interact with one another.聽 It ran over six weeks.聽

鈥淚 was nervous and shy, which I still am,鈥� says Brown.

She tried the drums and crochet and stuck around for the beading. She made new friends. She found someone to go to church with.聽

鈥淚 don鈥檛 feel alone as much as I did. If I have a problem, I have someone I can talk to,” said Brown.聽

One of the women she met introduced her to a grief support group, which Brown also joined.聽

Volunteer 海角社区官网found the project so effective at drawing people together, it wants to offer micro-grants annually, but so far, has not been able to find the it needs to keep running them.

The micro-grants essentially created new social spaces at a time when people are withdrawing from more traditional social activities, like meeting friends at a movie theatre on a Friday night or dining out with them.

According to data from Statistics Canada, the percentage of Canadians over the age of 15 who attended a cultural event, movie, exhibit, theatre or concert on an average day dropped from 2.3 per cent in 2005 to 0.7 per cent in 2022-2023.聽

It’s not just that people can’t find others to go out with 鈥� even when they do, they sometimes can’t follow through.聽

Flaking聽鈥� cancelling plans with others at the last minute for no truly good reason聽鈥� has become so common it’s on social media.

鈥淚f people do flake out, it鈥檚 almost a relief, it鈥檚 like: 鈥業 can stay home and do what I really want to do, I just didn鈥檛 want to be the one to flake out,’” says Christine Etherington, 46, a 海角社区官网resident who recently took steps to jump-start her own social life.聽

鈥淎 lot of people just feel exhausted, and maybe their social life is the first thing to go.”聽

Huynh blames Toronto’s hustle culture for leaving people feeling too overwhelmed to connect. Everyone in their 20s seems to be working flat-out to afford a place to live and maybe save some money; and with commuting gobbling up so much time, even if you do meet someone you want to hang out with, it’s hard to make it happen, he says.

Forget about making plans for dinner聽鈥� always pressed for time, Huynh says he used to grab meals on the fly to eat at home.聽

Huynh’s experience is reflected in statistics that show dining alone is on the rise. According to OpenTable data, solo dining in 海角社区官网increased 23 per cent between Jan. 1 and Nov. 15, 2024, compared to the same time period 2024. Nationally, the figure was 13 per cent.聽

The Millennial generation (aged 29-44) is the fastest-growing cohort of 鈥渁lone鈥� diners, according to Vince Sgabellone, a foodservice industry analyst for Circana, a research company that measures consumer shopping behaviours across 12 different retail industries in Canda.

He聽points to Stats Can census data that shows that between 1981 and 2021, the number of single-adult households rose from 20 per cent to 29 per cent.

鈥淭here are a lot more single people out there.”

But there is research that shows that even when we get more leisure time, we鈥檙e not choosing to spend it with others.聽

A recent聽聽found that people working from home gain about an extra half hour in leisure time per day, on average, because they don鈥檛 have to commute to work. But they鈥檙e not using it to socialize. They鈥檙e mostly using it to watch television.

People get into comfortable routines, and technology allows us to get wrapped up in our own little worlds, says McKiernan. The muscles we use to socialize weaken. But we’re mistaken if we think social media can replace actual socializing.聽

Research has shown that seeing people in person brings with it a host of benefits that , including better mental health, especially for young adults.聽

It’s work to rebuild a social network, but those who take the time say it’s worth the effort.聽

Etherington said that when she attended school in New York City in her 20s, she immediately fell into a “How I Met Your Mother,” situation, meeting a group of women on at the first social event she attended and remaining close friends with until graduation.

The group naturally dispersed after graduation and she moved back to Toronto, where her social network from Queen’s University, which she had previously attended, was dispersing too. She found herself with a slimmed-down friend group and not many avenues for making new ones. She doesn’t have kids, so making mom connections is out. She doesn’t have a pet, so making friends at the dog park isn’t an option.聽

Things changed for Etherington when she joined , a bustling online community founded to help 海角社区官网women make friends in person. She attended several of the meet-ups, which usually involve an activity聽鈥斅爈ike perfume-making or brunch.聽

The advantage to belonging to the group, says Etherington, is that women are joining specifically to make friends, so starting a conversation feels comfortable.

鈥淭hey come across as wanting to connect and make genuine friendships,” she says.聽

Huynh had no trouble making friends in Calgary, and says the move has improved his mental health. He feels people are more able to meet up because they don’t have to work as hard to make ends meet. Rents are lower, and they don’t face the long commutes common in Toronto. They have more time to hang out.聽

He doesn鈥檛 regret having lived in Toronto聽鈥斅爄ronically perhaps, hustle culture has rubbed off on him. He has a full-time job, recently got his realtor鈥檚 licence, runs and is looking into becoming a fitness instructor.

鈥満＝巧缜偻鴋as definitely instilled that work ethic. I find it difficult to turn it off.鈥�

Correction - April 10, 2025

This article was updated from a previous version to note that in the wake of the 2023 loneliness report,聽Volunteer 海角社区官网gave out 35 micro-grants, not 36, in 2024.