Volodymyr Zelenskyy has endured more stress in three years than most do in a lifetime.
Monday was a grim anniversary for Ukraine鈥檚 president. On Feb. 24, 2022, Russian tanks rolled into his country and launched a barbaric invasion. The world gasped with shock and horror. Allies encouraged Mr. Zelenskyy to seek safe harbour in a friendly nation.
He balked at leading in exile. He refused to leave his country and his people.
Monday was grim for another reason. At the UN General Assembly, the United States voted against a resolution condemning Russia for the invasion. In a moment of historic shame, America now stands with Russia, Belarus and North Korea on the global chessboard.
It鈥檚 as if Roosevelt concluded Hitler really wasn鈥檛 the problem.
Mr. Zelenskyy is scheduled to visit Washington on Friday. He may well be put up at a Motel 6 based on the way Donald Trump has denigrated him. Trump has called Zelenskyy a 鈥渄ictator鈥 and accused Ukraine of starting the war.
That’s like blaming Sharon Tate for getting stabbed to death.
But Zelenskyy does not have the luxury of time to unravel this betrayal. He is in the Upside Down, forced to convince his benefactor he is not the bad guy.
Mr. Zelenskyy needs to go to Washington with a charm offensive.
Trump is demanding Ukraine sign a contract to give the U.S. billions in natural resources, including lithium, iron, uranium and titanium. What Ukraine gets in exchange is not clear. The New York Times obtained a draft agreement of the deal on Wednesday and noted it did not include any security guarantees for the besieged country. Huh?
Even the mafia provides the muscle after a shakedown for protection money.
Zelenskyy is now at war with two dictators: Vladimir Putin and Donald Trump.
Putin wants to destroy Ukraine. Trump wants to pickpocket it while it still has pockets. Repulsive? Depraved? A complete 180 on the postwar order in which America branded itself a champion of freedom and democracy? It is all of those things. But Zelenskyy, a former comedian and TV star, also knows Trump is a fellow traveller from the entertainment swamps.
To save Ukraine, he must put on a good show at the White House.
Trump is both transactional and zero-sum. He resents giving. He doesn鈥檛 share fries and he can鈥檛 understand why America helps other countries, including sovereign allies that are attacked by a ruthless aggressor. It鈥檚 why Trump refuses to blame Russia. Deep down, he admires Putin鈥檚 鈥渢ake what you want鈥 savagery. It鈥檚 why he keeps acting like Zelenskyy borrowed $500 for Taylor Swift concert tickets and never paid him back. What a mess.
NATO made a dreadful mistake three years ago when it slow-rolled arms shipments to Ukraine over fears of escalation. Granted, you don鈥檛 want to gamble on nuclear Armageddon. But Russia has always exported as much saber-rattling as vodka. Putin is a monster. He is not suicidal.
If Ukraine had been armed to the teeth with F-16s, Leopard 2s, M777 howitzers, Storm Shadows, ATACMS missiles, HIMARS, M1 Abrams and Switchblade drones at the start of this war, the victory parade in Kyiv would be a distant memory.
Peace talks with a murderous thug always end up as appeasement talks.
You can鈥檛 change the past. But Zelenskyy can shape the future by mending his broken relationship with Trump. Accusing the U.S. president of living in a 鈥渄isinformation bubble,鈥 as he recently did, is not helpful even if true.
Don鈥檛 poke the bear, Volodymyr 鈥 tickle its orange chin.
As the cameras are rolling, Zelenskyy should thank Trump for trying to end this horrific war. He should say once Ukraine is liberated, the country will build a Trump Hotel in every city. There will be Trump statues in town squares and a new national holiday. Ukrainian scientists will invent Trump golf clubs made out of rare earth minerals. The country will launch a new TV channel called 鈥淒onald鈥檚 Vision.鈥 All poisonous snakes in the country will be renamed Pelosis.
Then Zelenskyy should whisper to Trump: 鈥淣one of this happens if Russia wins.鈥
If Trump needs more convincing, Zelenskyy should take him to McDonald鈥檚, ask for advice on how to control the media, marvel at his historic comeback, trash-talk Jack Smith, ask if Barron wants to be hooked up with a Ukrainian supermodel and then list his favourite scenes from 鈥淭he Apprentice.鈥
On Wednesday, Trump shared a bonkers AI video imagining a new 鈥淭rump Gaza,鈥 replete with five-star hotels, bearded belly dancers and giant gold statues of himself. Mr. Zelenskyy should watch that video before he goes to Washington. It is both telling and depressing.
The fate of Ukraine is in the hands of an American madman.
Only a crafty showman can rewrite the script before it鈥檚 too late.
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